Today I feel like wallowing. I know it's not a good place to be and that in fact it will just make me miserable. This move has been hard; it's been more than hard--it's been a huge challenge for me as a person and for us as a family. I'm so happy that the children have adjusted so well; they are active with sports, school and many friends. I need to focus on that and not that they are all teenagers or preteens with all the attitudes and hormones that go with it. They are good kids and I truly think at least one of them will be a phenomenal trial lawyer who can take care of me in my old age. They are getting plenty of practice stating their cases! We've (Chris and I) done a good job landing the children with minimum discomfort. I wish I was a kid again and in school where making friends just came along with the day. Hindsight shows me how much easier life was then, but you couldn't have told me that then.
Actually all of our moves have been hard in some ways. (I still firmly believe that this has been the hardest) But hindsight shows me the blessings that each of those moves has given to me personally and us as a family. My path has been accelerated because of our move to England; the friends we now have all over the United States and England. Friendships I will treasure forever. I look back on the experiences that led me to grow personally and for us to grow as a married couple and a family. I know that God met me where I was and worked for good in all things--and I now, with hindsight see that good. On days like today, I wish I could just get a glimpse of that hindsight for this situation. Instead, I get to hold onto hope. I will cling to the hope for the future which is not pie in the sky hope. It is the sure knowledge that God has been with me before in hard times and that indeed good did come. It is remembering that I am not alone--it is remembering the past goodness that has come into my life and trusting in the hope of the future.
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