The Joy of Lent (Madness)

I'm feeling a little guilty right now because....I am absolutely

LOVING Lent this year! I'm having fun and I'm full of joy (except last night when my beloved Hoos lost but that really has nothing to do with Lent--that's that other madness...) But I'm feeling guilty because all this fun really goes against my upbringing and the "tradition" of Lent...you know all that somber sacrifice and stuff...(I don't even get my spring china out until Lent is over...it's too happy)

Maybe it's because I feel like I've been living that other kind of Lent for so long even when it wasn't Lent that this year Lent is speaking to me in an entirely different way. I don't know, but I love it! It started on Ash Wednesday when I remembered and then preached that not only were we wearing ashes on our head symbolizing mourning, mortality, and penance, but they were in the SHAPE OF A CROSS. A cross on our foreheads symbolizing we belong to Christ--sealed and marked as Christ's own forever at our baptism and reminded on Ash Wednesday. We belong to, are beloved children of God, now that's happy stuff! (Please tell me someone else giggled just a little bit reading the Gospel admonishing us to beware of practicing piety before others right before we had ashes put on our foreheads to be seen by everyone throughout the day....)

Then on the first Sunday of Lent as I chanted the Great Litany. (yes, I did and not only that, I did a decent job if I do say so myself, and my husband said so too! He came in late and wondered who it was chanting...I'm okay with the fact he was surprised it was me; I was too!) As I chanted every line came alive to me in a way it never has before. I was overwhelmed with a peace that despite the sins of the world God is indeed in control and God is actively participating with us on a daily basis in all that we do so that the Kingdom of God will continue to break through.

So much joy!!!

But perhaps what has given me the greatest joy this year is Lent Madness. I've participated for five years, but this year it has taken on a deeper meaning for me. (Not to mention it is great fun talking Saint smack with my parishioners. Being on the V Show on ESPN wasn't too bad either--don't you think I should be a regular guest? Let's get that vote going...) Anyway, this year Lent Madness has helped me to grow in my hope for the world. This year I am reminded every day that individuals--flawed individuals, individuals with sketchy pasts, individuals others considered worthless, individuals who were just living their lives where they were in the best way they could, have made a difference in the world and so I am strengthened and inspired to try to do the same in this little corner of Louisville Kentucky where I live and work and play.

For example (you knew I'd have examples) Moses the Black--as my friend and senior warden said, "That was one bad dude!" He was the leader of a gang of bandits terrorizing the Nile Valley and HE CHANGED!!! Why is that hope for today? I'm so glad you asked. Back in the 4th century there were gangs, there are gangs today. Back in the 4th century a leader of a gang was changed and then went on to become a spiritual leader (and to defeat John Wycliffe which did not make me or my bracket happy). Hope my friends, hope! People can and do change even people we think are hopeless, are too terrible to change, people we in our humanity write off as just bad people, they can change---I've added praying for members of gangs to my daily prayers.

Or how about David Oakerhater a Native American warrior and spiritual leader who became an artist and Episcopal deacon. Oakerhater was taken captive during the Red River War. Captain Pratt, who was in charge of the prisoners, wanted to assimilate the Native Americans into mainstream society and have them totally give up their culture. But guess what!?!!?! As he got to know the prisoners and as trust was built, HE CHANGED HIS MIND!!!  He changed his mind and he convinced his superiors. Over time the Native Americans, led by Oakerhater, taught the townspeople about their culture, art and dance and the townspeople taught them. Hope, hope hope!!!! People can change; cultures can learn to live together even enhancing one another's lives. That's not somber, that's exciting!!!

One of my favorites is Amelia Bloomer (I have her going all the way to the finals where she alas will be defeated...). Why do I love her? Well because she's awesome of course (minus that whole temperance movement thing--I am living in the great state of Kentucky which in addition to basketball has some of the finest bourbon...), but I love her because she was a major proponent of all women's rights and although this is not her only or perhaps anywhere close to her most important work--she cared about women's fashion and even more importantly, at least to me, she believed women should be able to wear what they want! YEAH!!!! I can wear what I want and my beloved grandmother can rest in peace knowing her warning to me right before she died to "not become a dowdy priest or I will haunt you" wasn't necessary--Amelia Bloomer said so!!

But the Golden Halo--Franz Jaegerstaetter of Austria. Born to a chamber maid mother and a farmer father, Franz was a little on the wild side as a teen. (Some would say I should be able to identify with that...I plead the fifth). I suspect he just pushed the bar a little further than most. When he became an adult, he married, had 3 children very quickly (I can definitely identify with that), and was a farmer and miner. Ordinary stuff, BUT WAIT!!!! He was the only one in his village to vote against uniting with Germany and he remained openly anti-Nazi--even his priest and bishop wouldn't stand up against the Nazis, but Franz did--this young man with a checkered past who lived an ordinary life doing ordinary things, made a stand for what he believed was right even though he stood alone. He was called to active duty and refused to fight for the Third Reich. Again his priest tried to get him to change his mind knowing if he didn't he would be executed, but again this ordinary man living an ordinary life did something extraordinary--he stood his ground and for that he was killed.

Franz encourages me; Franz inspires me to want to make a difference. Franz lived in a little village and lived his faith right where he was. He didn't go to a big rally; he didn't need a pulpit; he didn't need a posse of supporters telling him he was right; he just did what he believed was the right thing right where he was. I can almost hear him saying, "Go and do likewise..." (which I know actually comes from the Good Samaritan, but I bet Franz knew that story!)

I take it back--I'm not going to feel guilty about being joyful during Lent. I'm going to take my joy, all the things I'm learning and I'm going to try to make a difference right here in my little corner of Kentucky. Thanks Lent Madness for leading the way. Now back to studying my bracket...

And when I get home, that spring china is coming out!!!

God's Hands and a Heroin Overdose

I'm haunted and so I write.....

Monday night Boss came home from work; I was busy and couldn't talk. (Yes Mama guilt, but hang tight that will be replaced by Mama pride). Tuesday morning as William was leaving for school he asked, "Did you hear about the person who died in Christopher's arms yesterday?" Of course he said this as he was walking out the door; thank goodness Chris was home to fill me in.....(I'm adding some of the details I learned later from Boss himself)

Boss works at Norton Audubon Hospital as a valet. Monday afternoon a car came flying up the wrong way. The valets scrambled (I assume to keep an accident from happening, and I assume annoyed...). Boss ran over to the car where an older couple was shouting and pointing to the backseat. There was a young man in the car convulsing. The couple didn't know him but had found him on the side of the road, and they just couldn't not stop. (Remind you of the Good Samaritan?)  Boss opened the door and gently lifted the man out. He was covered in vomit and diarrhea. Boss held the man in his arms and he stopped convulsing. "We think he's overdosing," the couple declared. Boss turned and ran towards the ER where he was met by a physician who grabbed the man's arm and said, "No pulse." Boss gently laid the man down and went back to work.  The next day Boss went into find out what happened, actually pretty much already knowing but needing to know for certain. The man was 21 and it was a heroin overdose; he didn't make it.

If I'm honest, I want Boss to process this with me more. I'm worried about how it has impacted him; perhaps because it has impacted me so profoundly. I was immediately reminded of another time, at another hospital where a young man was overdosing. I wrote about that too....Boots on the Ground Ministry. I remembered how coldly that young man was greeted and treated by the EMT, and I still shudder recalling the event. I remember trying to understand how he could be so cold and uncaring--trying to rationalize it. Today I think about both those boys and the mamas who love them. I have no idea if the young man on Monday was estranged from his family; I have no idea what his relationship with his mama is, but I am a mama to 2 sons close to the age (as well as 2 daughters). I think about no matter how old they get, how much bigger they are than me, they are still my babies and they are still beloved children of God. I think about how gently I held my babies and I hope that mama knows her son was held gently. I wish I could tell her he was.

That young man regardless of how he got to the point of Monday is a child of God. I hope he died knowing someone held him in his arms that cared. I hope he died knowing someone held him that recognized his personhood. I hope he died knowing there were 3 people (the couple and my son) who respected his dignity and knew he had worth. I hope he died knowing in that brief moment he was loved--not in the hallmark mushy love but as the conduits of the love of God kind of love. And I hope that young man is at peace.

This Lent I am following SSJE's 5 marks of love (5 Marks of Love) Today the question asked was, "How are you going to be God's hands in the world today?"

There are no shortages of opportunities; it's how we respond to them that matters....

I'm Not Giving Up Facebook for Lent

This morning I woke up to multiple facebook posts announcing

people were giving up facebook for Lent. They reminded people to stay in touch by email or text (interesting I didn't see any that said by snail mail or phone calls) I'm not giving up facebook for Lent.

I do understand facebook can be a total time sucker; I do understand that particularly lately there has been (and probably will continue to be) some nastiness.  I do understand there are many people who overshare. (and I do understand I may be one of them...) I understand all that, and I considered giving it up for some of those very good reasons, but I'm not.

This Lent I am really focusing on relationship restoration and relationship building with God and others. God calls us to love God with our whole hearts and to love others as ourselves. Facebook allows me a glimpse (sometimes through cloudy windows or rose colored glasses) into the lives of others. Facebook allows me to rejoice with those who are celebrating and to mourn with those who are feeling down for any reason. Facebook allows me to respond to needs when I am able and to to pray for people when I am not (okay really I pray in addition to responding, but you get the point.)

And possibly most importantly facebook allows me the opportunity to practice my faith. I believe my love for God is shown most clearly through my love for others. Not the Hallmark mushy kind of love but the really hard getting down and dirty, wanting to walk away, wanting to disengage but staying put kind of love. Through others posts I get to practice seeking and serving Christ in all persons--those with whom I agree and those with whom I don't. I get to hear others' perspectives and consider how they are trying to live faith filled lives even if the way they do differs vastly from the way live mine. I get to practice proclaiming by the words I write on my own posts as well as the words I use when I respond to others the Good News of God in Christ. Facebook gives me a platform to strive for justice and peace among all. And facebook allows me to respect the dignity of every human being in how I respond or perhaps sometimes by not responding.

I do understand why people give facebook up for Lent, but I'm not. (my family would probably appreciate if I worked on the oversharing part....)