21 September, 2008

A Window's View of God

Last night Chris and I had a huge arguement. It's not really important what it was about except to say it wasn't about anything important. But I was very angry and in my anger I said some things I shouldn't have and I thought a lot of things that were very naughty. In the midst of this, I decided that it was too hot in the house. I also decided that I didn't "need" any help to fix this problem, and I certainly wasn't going to ask Chris to help. So, I climbed up on the kitchen counter, raised the window and put my arms in to raise the storm window and lower the screen. Now there was a piece of wood sitting there and I thought about using it to prop the window, but it seemed to be staying up so nicely on its own. Big mistake! Before I knew it, the window came crashing down on both my wrists. I was trapped by the window and screaming loudly. Chris ran in, lifted the window and my wrists immediately began to swell. We both knew they were broken.

This morning in church, I began to think about what happened and where God was in it. It really makes one think about their theology and where they see God acting in the world. One could say that God caused the window to fall to punish me for my ugliness, and I can say I would deserve that punishment. One could say that "no God is a loving God who doesn't cause pain for punishment, but that He made the window fall to stop me from saying and thinking anything else unkind." Or one could say that an accident happened, the window fell, and then I saw God. I saw God in my husband's loving face as he forgave everything I had just done and took care of me. He forgot about my ugliness and let his love enfold and protect me. Chris lived the incarnational love of Christ--no paybacks, no keeping score, and no reminding me today of how ugly (and stubborn) I was--just pure love.

Theologically that's where I see God. Bad things happen, sometimes really bad things. God doesn't cause it, but if we look we can see that God is right there with us in the ugliness and pain. God works for the good in all things--last night I felt the love of God, and this morning as I look and feel my very sprained and bruised but not broken wrists, I am reminded of God's love. And, although I believe God didn't cause the window to fall to punish me, I do believe that I can use this experience to remember to guard my tongue. It was a lesson learned in so many ways.

1 comment:

Friend said...

Flipping heck Katherine. That's a wee bit extreme. If your right hand offends you ....... You don't need to take it litereally! I'm glad your relationship mended - good old Chris. Hope the wrists mend quick - and thanks for the good post - but you shouldn't have gone to such lengths.