27 August, 2013

Holding Hands

Two nights ago Sarah Katherine climbed into my bed, laid her head on my shoulder and reached for my hand.  Instantaneously the memory of the first time she reached for my finger as an infant flashed through my mind.  She clung so tightly then, and she clung so tightly the other night.  It was a powerful moment that has stayed with me for several days.  That moment followed a conversation I had earlier in the day.  A close friend with a most precious 7 month old asked me, "What have you learned in the last 10 years that you would have done differently?"  I'm pretty sure I droned on about the same old things most parents do who have a child on the threshold of leaving home, but again I couldn't get this question out of my mind.  This morning on my run a list just kept coming, so here is is.

  • I would have said "no" to being on so many  boards and "yes" to more time being on swings
  • I would have smocked and sewn fewer clothes and spent more time getting the ones we had dirty
  • I would have made fewer gourmet meals and spent more time outside, rushing in to make whatever was quick (Lucy, I may have even made hamburger helper)
  • I would have spent less time worrying about the future and what might happen and more time enjoying the present
  • I would have spent less time asking questions and lecturing and more time listening
  • I would have spent less time running errands and more time running on playgrounds
  • I would have taken fewer pictures and been more involved in the moment
  • I would have spent less time trying to make sure I was getting it right and more time just getting it
  • I would have been less controlling about creating memories and more spontaneous in letting them happen
  • I would have spent less time rushing around and more time holding hands
And I wonder, what am I missing in this moment?  We all have to slow down, be present, and allow hands to clasp ours.  In our busy lives, in our busy world, there is so much that goes unnoticed.  So many hands reaching out for ours.  Take time and hold one today..