Never Let the Truth Get in the Way of a Good Story

I have been very productive this morning--written all my articles, worked on my sermon, folded laundry, unloaded the dishwasher, made biscuits--not because I wanted to get all that done (although it does feel good, I smugly say). I've been "busy" because I didn't want to write, and yet I knew I had to. I didn't want to write because I don't want to appear judgmental; I didn't want to write because it might make people mad including my children; I didn't want to write because it's painful. But, I've challenged St. Thomas to be not only a safe space but also a brave space, so I guess I need to venture into a brave space even though I'm going kicking and screaming--and crying....

Mark Twain said, "Never let the truth get in the way of a good story." I'm tired of being and my family being the good story.

Yesterday the psalm for morning prayer was 119:49-72. For years I choose a different color every

year (this year is pink). I also use the same prayer book for morning prayer underlining and writing notes in the margins. Verse 69 has several colors "The proud have smeared me with lies, but I will keep your commandments with my whole heart." I'm not so good at that....

I have several core beliefs about humanity. I believe most people want to be good and kind and care for others. I truly do, but I also believe we don't spend enough time thinking about what that means or how to live that out in our daily lives. I also think many of us have an insatiable need to be "in the know." Unfortunately that need, it seems, often trumps the desire to be good and kind and care for others. Often being good and kind and caring for others means keeping our mouths shut or even better using our mouths to reach out to others, TO the person not ABOUT the person.

Some things are freaking hard to do. When someone dies or diagnosed with an illness, it's hard, to reach out, but very often we find a way--a note, a call, a visit, a meal. There are other times it is so much harder, a miscarriage, infertility, addiction, divorce to name a few. So instead of talking TO the person we talk ABOUT the person. Sometimes we even convince ourselves we're doing it "because we care and we need to know the details before we can do or say anything." Then just like in the telephone game, or the need for a good story, the TRUTH disappears. When truth disappears anger, make that rage, and deep hurt takes its place.

When people are going through difficult things the last thing they need is to be the main characters in stories others have created for them. What they need is compassion and grace--sometimes space, sometimes a kind note, sometimes a phone call, ALWAYS dignity and respect and tons and tons of love.

Leaving the third person, what I need is the strength to forgive--to follow the commandments of God that require me to love everyone even those who hurt me (hard) and those who hurt my children (damn near impossible) and to forgive. I'm working on it; I'm trying really hard; I'm also admitting to myself sometimes I'm the author of other's stories, and I am terribly sorry for that. I'm tired of holding grudges but I'm still so angry and hurt I can't seem to forgive. But I'm trying...

So today I'll cling to the closing verses of Morning Prayer, "Glory to God whose power, working in us, can do infinitely more than we can ask or imagine." (Ephesians 3:20)