I do love technology. I love the way it helps me stay connected to friends that are far away. I love the way I can reconnect with people. I love being able to handle so many things online that took hours before, but when it comes to my children--well, the jury is still out.
I do like that they can keep up with old friends. It helps assuage the guilt of all the moves. But I don't like the way it makes them grow up so fast. At the risk of sounding very old and crtochety. When I was 13, we had two phones in the house--1 in the kitchen and 1 in my parent's bedroom. Private conversations were hard to have. I realize now that's not such a bad thing. It helped us to have conversations that were beyond our years. Facebook, instant message, texting and email--conversations and discussions occur that although the children want to think they are capable of handling, they're not. They're fingers can type beyond their emotional maturity. That added to the fact that it's instantaneous is a recipe for disaster.
If I wanted to write a mean note, I wrote it and then had to find the person and give it to him/her. Took time and hopefully gave me time to realize what a bad idea it was. With technology today, emotions run high, words are typed out and sent immediately without that buffer of "perhaps I shouldn't send it" time. There's something to be said for that time. There's something to be said for parents hearing and seeing things. We can use them as opportunities for discussion and growth. Technology is forcing our children to grow up too fast.
That being said, it's here to stay. Makes parenting more timeconsuming--checking messages etc. and it's a balance between staying informed by checking things and giving the children some privacy. It's a tightrope that I'm working out slowly in my mind. I'm not there yet and even once I get there, chances are there will be a detour or a continued journey. But,it's not a road I'll leave, I love my children too much.
3 comments:
Scary times we are in. I can only imagine what will be available when my boys are that age.
Remember when we used to talk about the "scary" things that happened to us when we were teenagers and then said, "I can only imagine what OUR children will have to deal with!"....well....this is the stuff we could hardly imagine. I get so nervous when I think about moving back to "the States" because we will have to face this. Andrew and Catherine don't do it here because it's too expensive and our world is very small. NOW I'm feeling queasy...I'm sorry you have to deal with this right now. I love you, friend and I can't WAIT to live closer to you!!! :)
I think the fact that you are keeping up with the technology and using it alongside them, goes a big way toward modeling proper use, as well as staying in tune with what they are doing.
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