Love Wins--I Believe it Does, Not Sure Everyone Agrees

Yesterday I was happy dancing--literally; well, I was happy

I've already ordered my t-shirt

dancing until my almost 15 year old said, "You really have to stop doing that.  You're old--you're going to hurt yourself."  (I admit it was not my best dancing...)  But when the ruling from SCOTUS came down ruling in favor of same-sex marriage, my hands started shaking, tears streamed down my face and I just wanted to dance. Pictures of all those I know and love dearly who have been waiting for this day--to love the person they love openly, legally and not just civil union but MARRIAGE kept leaping to my mind. (For the record, while I have been passionate about this, my reaction caught me completely off guard..)

I started texting friends who have waited their whole lives for this moment.  I wanted to start planning the wedding of two of my dearest friends who have seen me through the ups and downs of the last year and now I get to marry them--legally and in Kentucky if they so choose!!!  My facebook feed was blowing up with rainbow colors and I kept dancing--in my room away from the gaze of my judgmental children (they judge no one but me....).  And then suddenly I froze...

I started thinking about people I know who weren't happy dancing (and not because they care what their children think)--people I know and care about--good people, faithful people, but people who I knew were not celebrating.  I started thinking about people who I know have struggled with this issue and for their own reasons do not see things the way I do.  I started thinking about deep conversations I have had with people who have prayed and studied and what they believe--deeply believe--is that marriage is between a man and a woman period.

I thought particularly about a conversation I had just this past year where the person said, "I know if the Supreme Court rules for same sex marriage and if during General Convention the Episcopal Church agrees, I will be on the outside and I wonder how people will treat me."  When this person said it to me, there was sadness in the voice and this person continued with, "I suspect I'll feel very lonely and alone."

I have to admit, there was a part of me that wants to say and stand behind, "Now you'll know how our LGBT brothers and sisters have felt all these years.  Now maybe you'll see why this is so important. See how it feels?" Okay, I am saying that a little bit.  But, my heart is also hurting that there will still be people who feel lonely and on the outside.  I believe yesterdays ruling is carrying us one step (many steps) closer to the Kingdom of God, but knowing there are still those who feel excluded--who feel on the outside,  I also know we're not there yet.

I can't change how I feel--I won't apologize for believing what I believe INCLUSIVITY FOR ALL--marriage for all.  I believe to my very core this is good and right and holy.  Nonetheless, I can try to understand others--I can try.  So I sent an email to my friend just to say I remembered the conversation and I hoped that loneliness and exclusion would not be felt--I just wanted this person to know I remembered.  And then I returned to my dancing....

Disclaimer: This is a hard blog to write.  I want to only celebrate; I want people to say as my children did when they were very little, "Why does anyone care who marries who? Why is it anyone's business?"I want to think those who don't agree with me are ignorant; I want to believe that one day they'll "see the light", but that is denying their rights to believe as they do.  And I believe we are called to love everyone--those with whom we agree and those with whom we don't.  And I believe we are all welcomed at the table--God loves EVERYONE no exceptions.