In the Box

We've all heard it before "there's a difference between listening and hearing". It's really hit me hard over the last couple of weeks. Some people are so wonderful about really hearing others--what they're saying and how they're feeling. Sometimes you can hear with words and sometimes without. It occurs to me that some of the people that are the worst at hearing are those closest to us. The ones that think they know us so well so they "know" how you feel, what you think, or what you mean. The other barrier to hearing is having a preconceived idea of what the person is going to say. Sometimes that is because we love someone so much that we want to hear the are fine, things are better, and they're doing great. We want that so much that "we hear it". It's hard to step back and realize that just because we have known someone for years and know so much about them doesn't mean we can know what they continue to think. People change; they grow; they have new ideas, new life experiences; new challenges, successes and failures--all these things change how people view themselves, others, and the world.

It's wonderful to have those around that know us well--that indeed at times can almost read our minds, but we must all remember that life is about changing and because we understood yesterday doesn't mean it hasn't changed.

I wonder if we do that with God too? We have an idea of "our God"--how our God responds to us and the world and by not allowing that idea to expand, we miss out on seeing new and wondrous things--we miss out on seeing God work in new and marvelous ways. It's so easy to pray to God and then look for the answers--to "see signs" of what God wants for us. Are we looking for the signs that fit our preconceived notion of God or the signs that "fit" what we want?

It's time to step out of the box--to allow ourselves and those we love to evolve--sometimes that means we have to learn new things about them; how exciting! Sometimes we may learn things we don't love or that bring us some pain; but we have to trust that although the changes may not fit what we want for that person, maybe they do fit the person. And God? Let's get God out of the box--our relationship with God changes as we change. Trust--trust that the relationship will just grow stronger and that we will learn more and grow as our relationship deepens. We have to trust that God only wants the best for us even if that seems to change; even if it means stepping out of the box.