Connected

Yesterday I spent two hours with someone and not once did  I look at my watch or my phone. I know hard to believe, right? Even harder to believe is that I didn't have to have an inner talk with myself talking myself off the ledge with the anxiety that often comes from not being "connected" at all times.

Instead we had two hours of vulnerable, authentic sharing full of laughter and even a few tears. The "strangeness" (which is not the word I want to use but is the only one I can think of right now) is that according to society/culture "rules" and "norms" we don't, well we don't "fit."  We shouldn't be (I detest the word "should"), friends or confidants. But I can tell you, we did fit in a way that frankly is indescribable. The peace I felt after our time together was only the peace that can come from relationship based on mutual respect and that has at its core a foundational belief that all are worthy of dignity and respect and all are equally loved by God regardless of, well regardless of anything.

The other amazing part of this encounter was I did not spend the next hours and a sleepless night obsessing about what I shared and worried I had shared too much. Even I, one of most transparent people--or as my family calls it a compulsive over sharer (actually they aren't always that kind in their word choice...) have a limit on what I share. I have been burned, and it hurts. The scars are still there....

This morning on my run (which by the way was the best run I've had in months probably because I didn't have a sleepless night tossing and turning worried about my chronic oversharing) I thought about yesterday afternoon an afternoon I referred to on facebook as "holy." I also thought about authentic, vulnerable friendships. I believe they are indeed holy.

I believe vulnerability is powerful and brave. I believe that in being vulnerable with one another we connect the core of who we are as people created in God's image with the core of others. I also believe it's scary as hell. So why do it?

Because God did....

How much more vulnerable and exposed can you get than coming as a newborn baby, born to peasants in a manager? How much more vulnerable and exposed can you get than talking, eating and touching those who by society's standards you weren't supposed to interact with much less touch? How much more vulnerable and exposed can you get than to be publicly beaten and left hanging on a cross for all to see? And how many lives were transformed and saved because God did?

I also recognize there were times during Jesus' life where he had to be protected--where being vulnerable and exposed was not the healthy life giving choice. Joseph, Mary and Jesus fled to Egypt; there were times he had to leave a place to be safe, but the transformation of relationships came when he was fully present and fully connected. Jesus connected with others and  holy and unusual and life giving relationships were formed.


Yesterday I didn't look at my phone, didn't even want to look at my phone--but I was definitely connected.