We, I, Learned from the Best

Today we celebrate the life of Mrs. Hardwick who tried over the years to get me to call her Laurie, but I can't. But we also celebrate the resurrection because we know because Christ came and died and rose again death has been defeated and that there is nothing that can separate us from the love of God.

But I think the most powerful verse in the Bible is “Jesus wept” because I think that reminds us that because God came in the flesh, God understands every emotion that we have. He stood at the grave of his friend.  He stood with Lazarus's sisters in their anguish and their grief. He felt their agony and their pain, and he was angry, and he hurt.  As you begin this new normal, I believe God is telling us that all these emotions we are feeling are OK.

As I was thinking about speaking today, I remember being in Mrs. Hardwick’s kitchen in the eighth grade and something had happened. A trip was cancelled, and I had been made to feel a little guilty for being upset.  Mrs. Hardwick said, “Katherine, there is nothing wrong with being disappointed and sad. There is no shame at all in how you feel.”  

And so today is a celebration of the resurrection but I really because it’s Mrs. Hardwick, it's as much about the incarnation, Christ coming in the flesh and asking us all to be his hands and feet as we lead our lives of discipleship.

When we read or pray the Lord's prayer and say, “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven” I think Mrs. Hardwick lived that—every day.  It wasn’t about waiting for what would happen in heaven after death and for eternity. It was about bringing that here and now to all of us that she touched. She was loving and kind. I’m an Episcopal priest, and some of y’all may know there’s a famous Episcopal priest who preached at a famous wedding.  He talks about God all the time, he’s a much better preacher than I am, and he talks about God and God is love and God loves everybody no exceptions.  God is forgiving and merciful and kind and doesn't seek to denigrate or to shame. And that’s how Mrs. Hardwick was. And my heaven was in her kitchen, growing up.

 I remember one day a neighbor came in and as you walked in the back door there's a little half bath. And Mrs. Hardwick took this young lady, who was our age, into the half bath and they had a conversation and they came out and they joined us at the counter.  Later, because I’m kind of nosey, I asked, “Mrs. Hardwick, what did you tell her?” She said, “That’s between us; it doesn't matter. All is forgiven.z’

She was there with kindness and words leaning against the counter as we droned on  endlessly about whatever it was.

Now just in case you’re beginning to think she might be God, I think there were times that she got really irritated and bored. And I think she really liked when that phone rang and one of the rental properties needed to be looked at. And she would say, “Girls why don't you go with your father. He’ll stop at Dairy Queen on the way home.” If it were the 21st-century I would swear she had texted the tenants to say, “Please call them.”

 I have four of my own children who are young adults. Tthey asked me quite frequently, in fact just a couple days ago I was FaceTiming with my youngest whose in college, and some boys came behind her and started talking to me. She said again, as they often say, “I just understand why people like you.” They’ve said, “We don't understand why people want to come to our house. It’s soooo boring.” So that's just an invitation to any young adults. If you really want to come somewhere and be really bored, you're welcome to come to our house. But two days ago when Caroline said that to me with the boys in the background waving. I said, “Because I learned from Mrs. Hardwick.”

You're beginning a journey and it's not an easy one. Thank you for sharing your wife and your mother with us. I know there were times you wanted her for yourself. I know there were times it was inconvenient. But my life has been changed. Thank you. But as you being this time, let us love you, support you, welcome you, even when it’s inconvenient, because it never will be because we learned from the best.